“I am not my doubt”

There’s this game. Unfortunately, it’s not Monopoly or Hide-n-Seek. Instead, it’s the game of wearing the right labels, hanging with the right people, saying all the right things, and picking the right major.

The older I get, and the more places I go, I realize this ‘game’ is played by many people. Too many people.
Maybe you yourself know some of the players: maybe it’s your sibling, maybe it’s your best friend, maybe it’s even you.

As great as this whole game sounds, I have zero desire to play it because in the end, no one truly wins. And if someone does ‘win’—they get to stand on a hollow podium and receive the empty reward of popularity. Cool.

My doubt stems from not playing the game of ‘rights’ that so many people seem so eager to win. Why is it that I think this game is so trivial when so many people around me don’t? When my choices and decisions don’t match up with those of the majority I question everything.

“Should I?”
“Is this good?”

This is how I see it–
At the end of the day, we all only live once. There’s no ‘do overs’ allowed. Some pretend better than others but we’re all just winging it, really. So, no one group or person has any right to dictate what’s ‘right’ or ‘wrong’ or what’s ‘cool’ and what’s ‘weird’. I just hope that when all is said and done I can look back and say “yup, I played the ‘game’ in the best way that has made me the most happy.”
I hope you will be able to say the same.

I am not my doubt. I am my own game.